Ioman
03-22-2005, 12:43 PM
Dead Duck
> > >
> > > A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary
> > > surgeon As she lay
> > > her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his
> > > stethoscope and listened to
> > > the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet
> > > shook his head sadly
> > > and said, "I'm so sorry, your pet has passed away."
> > >
> > > The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure? "Yes,
> > > I'm sure. The duck is
> > > dead," he replied. "How can you be so sure", she
> > > protested. "I mean, you
> > > haven't done any testing on him or anything. He
> > > might just be in a coma
> > > or something."
> > >
> > > The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the
> > > room. He returned a
> > > few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever.
> > > As the duck's owner
> > > looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind
> > > legs, put his front
> > > paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck
> > > from top to bottom.
> > > He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook
> > > his head. The vet
> > > patted the dog and took it out and returned a few
> > > moments later with a
> > > beautiful cat. The cat jumped up on the table and
> > > also sniffed the bird
> > > from its beak to its tail and back again. The cat
> > > sat back on its
> > > haunches, shook its head, meowed softly, jumped down
> > > and strolled out of
> > > the room.
> > >
> > > The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry,
> > > but as I said, this is
> > > most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
> > > Then the vet turned to
> > > his computer terminal, hit a few keys, and produced
> > > a bill, which he
> > > handed to the woman.
> > >
> > > The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill.
> > > "$150!" she cried.
> > > "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!"
> > >
> > > The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word
> > > for it, the bill
> > > would have been $20. But what with the Lab Report
> > > and the Cat Scan, it
> > > all adds up."
> > >
> > > A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary
> > > surgeon As she lay
> > > her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his
> > > stethoscope and listened to
> > > the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet
> > > shook his head sadly
> > > and said, "I'm so sorry, your pet has passed away."
> > >
> > > The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure? "Yes,
> > > I'm sure. The duck is
> > > dead," he replied. "How can you be so sure", she
> > > protested. "I mean, you
> > > haven't done any testing on him or anything. He
> > > might just be in a coma
> > > or something."
> > >
> > > The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the
> > > room. He returned a
> > > few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever.
> > > As the duck's owner
> > > looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind
> > > legs, put his front
> > > paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck
> > > from top to bottom.
> > > He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook
> > > his head. The vet
> > > patted the dog and took it out and returned a few
> > > moments later with a
> > > beautiful cat. The cat jumped up on the table and
> > > also sniffed the bird
> > > from its beak to its tail and back again. The cat
> > > sat back on its
> > > haunches, shook its head, meowed softly, jumped down
> > > and strolled out of
> > > the room.
> > >
> > > The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry,
> > > but as I said, this is
> > > most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
> > > Then the vet turned to
> > > his computer terminal, hit a few keys, and produced
> > > a bill, which he
> > > handed to the woman.
> > >
> > > The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill.
> > > "$150!" she cried.
> > > "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!"
> > >
> > > The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word
> > > for it, the bill
> > > would have been $20. But what with the Lab Report
> > > and the Cat Scan, it
> > > all adds up."