April Showers bring...first jokes of May!

[IronSerif]

Seis De Mayo! lol. Hope everyone enjoyed their Cinco De Mayo, spent mine at DuClaws :)
About two weeks left of school, and 20 more days left until graduation. And the coutndown continues...

So in the meantime...Joke time! Enjoy :D





My neighbor found out her dog could hardly hear so she took it to the veterinarian. He found the problem was hair in its ears and cleaned both ears and the dog could hear fine.

The vet told the lady if she wanted to keep this from reoccurring she should go to the store and get some "Nair" hair remover and rub in its ears once a month.

The lady goes to the drug store and gets some "Nair" hair remover. At the register the druggist tells her "If you're going to use this under your arms don't use deodorant for a few days.

The lady says "I'm not using it under my arms."

The druggist says "If you're using it on your legs don't shave for a couple of days."

The lady says "I'm not using it on my legs either, and if you must know I'm using it on my schnauzer."

The druggist says "Stay off your bicycle for a week."

:smack

[IronSerif]

And last one for the day...


Henry Ford died and went to heaven. At the gates, an angel told
Ford, "Well, you've been such a good guy and your invention-the
assembly line-changed the world. As a reward, you can hangout with
anyone you want to in Heaven."

Ford thinks about it and says, "I want to hang out with God Himself."
The be-feathered fellow at the Gates took Ford to the Throne Room and
introduced him to God. Ford then asked God, "Hey, aren't you the
inventor of Woman?"

God said, "Ah, yes."

"Well," said Ford, "you have some major design flaws in your
invention:

1. there's too much front end protrusion

2. it chatters at high speeds

3. maintenance is very costly

4. it constantly needs repainting and refinishing

5. it is out of commission 5 or 6 of every 28 days

6. the rear end wobbles too much, and

7. The intake is placed too close to the exhaust."

"Hmmm," replied God, "hold on." God went to the Celestial
Supercomputer, typed in a few keystrokes, and waited for the results.
The computer printed out a slip of paper.

"It may be that my invention is flawed," God replied to Henry
Ford, "but according to statistics, more men are riding my invention
than yours!"



Alright crew time for work. Before I leave, I must tell everyone not to forget MOTHERS DAY IS THIS WEEKEND!!! Please don't forget your beloved mothers this weekend, they did give birth to you (unless you're one of my sisters..which we found in the dumpsters lol! j/k girls :P)

Have a great day everyone and enjoy the weekend :D

[ECA]

and think about the SIZE of your head, and HOW that could EVER come thru a hole the size of your fist....

Happy mothers day...

[IronSerif]

ECA..lol..


I just heard this joke like 2 mins ago...and I don't think I could wait till friday to post it lol!


During a good manners and etiquette class, the teacher says to her students: "If you were courting a well educated young girl from a prominent family and during a dinner for two you needed to go to the toilet, what would you say to her?"
Mike replies: Wait a minute. I'm going for a piss.
The teacher says: "That would be very rude and improper on your part."
Johnny replied: "I'm sorry I need to go to the toilet. I'll be back in a minute."
The teacher says: "That's much better but to mention the word 'toilet' during a meal, is unpleasant."
And Charlie says: "My dear, please excuse me for a moment. I have to go shake hands with a personal friend, whom, I hope, to be able to introduce to you after dinner."

[ECA]

VERY good

Lo9ve a polite(?) put down...